ELECTRONIC DEVICES, FULL OF VICES

This morning as I woke up to the vibration of my phone, I got to thinking about all the electronic devices around my bed/fort/nest. There is the phone, and my Lady-Comp, which tells me when I'm allowed to have condom free sex and still not make babies (Ladies and Gents I really hate putting those mofo hormones in my body). At the foot of the nest resides the record player that I got for 35 dollars from an old fella that Drew and I happened upon while out for blood. And record players. We went to his house to pick it up, and for a minute I thought he might club us over the heads and eat us. Who knows? Right?

Continuing on…there is a lamp, nothing special, gives me light. It lives in a bucket next to the bed. There is also a lava lamp, compliments of Andrew T. Beckham, but I don't often use it. That's equivalent to putting on the red light. Grrr. I don't need that sort of fancy atmosphere for your average am/pm j/o session with the bunny (also electronic and full of good vibes). Just some decent music on the record player. Finally, I have a vacuum at the top passenger side of the bed/nest/fort. It's not so I can clean up after guests or anything. I'm not that conscientious. It's a crucial element in the structure of the bed/nest/fort. That's all.

That's a quick tour of my electronica. You may visit if you like, but don't expect me to put on the lava lamp. I have fort tours daily at 3 pm. But there is an elementary school field trip tomorrow, so keep that in mind.